Illustration by Claire Robertson

My Name is Oskar Tex Hosken and I'm four years old. Daddy built my website for me and Mummy helps me write my journal. I have a little sister, Jasmine, who also has a website.

Read my guestbook

oskar at neuronwave dot com

Thursday, October 30, 2003
I've been reading my favourite book a lot over the last couple of weeks. It's The Magic Hat and I'm getting to know it really well. I read it out with Mum, and then read it by myself. Daddy recorded me saying it, so you can click here to hear me talk!

Wednesday, October 29, 2003
I had a very nice start to the day today. I woke at 6.15 and Mum came to change my nappy (pretty unusual, it's usually Daddy). I asked, 'Mummy, cuddle?' and amazingly, Mummy climbed in bed with me for a cuddle. I was so happy! She kept telling me to go back to sleep, but I was so happy that she was there that I kept on talking. I played around with Tinky Winky and bounced him off Mum's head, but mostly chatted away to her. One thing I told her about, that I've never mentioned before, was the noise that comes through the wall in the mornings. There's always a noise and then people talking and it wakes me up. Mum told Dad, and before I knew it, he'd rearranged my room so that my bedhead is away from the wall.

When Mum drove me to Michelle's this morning, I said, 'Mummy, it's very nice cuddle Oskar in bed'. She was very happy with that.

I love it when I eat my lunch at my blue table and Mum comes and sits with me. I have lunch straight after waking from my nap, so I'm usually feeling pretty perky and happy to talk. I love telling her to do things. I say:
'Mummy, foot under in there,' pointing under the table;
'Mummy, talk a Tom,' handing over the phone;
'Mummy, goopy nose,'
'Mummy, kiss Jasmine,'
'Mummy, look a drop's coming out,' (of a straw);
'Mummy, drink it all. Mummy's full,'
'Mummy, Okkar watch Wallace and Gwommit,'
'Mummy, take a straw out and drink it,'
'Mummy, buy more go-juice,'
'Mummy, buy more flakes and weetbix and eat,'
'Jasmine do, "ooh, ooh, ooh,"'
'Daddy laugh like Jasmine...Mummy do 'at,'
and that's in the first minute.

Sunday, October 26, 2003
I went to swimming with Mum again this week. When we do our 1-2-3's I had been sitting on the edge and then sort of sliding in to the water on three. Last term I stood and jumped, but then got a bit scared and wanted to sit. But this Monday I decided to stand up again. I had assured myself that Mum was up to the task of catching me, so I felt happy to jump. I'd also seen Oliver the week before do a huge jump and splash his Dad totally, so I thought that looked like fun. I did three big jumps and got Mum pretty wet, so I was happy with that. When we did 'What's the time Mr. Wolf?' Liza wanted me to go with her to be the wolf, but I refused as I always do, and got to be the wolf with Mummy instead. I held up my fingers to say what the time was - I was feeling to shy to say the numbers. But I did yell out, 'Dinner time!' and set off kicking really hard to chase them.

A few days after I got my injection Mum took Jasmine for an injection as well. I've thought about it quite a lot since I had it. I've been saying to Mum, 'See 'at nice lady at Dr. Sweet? Got jecshun in arm...Jasmine got jecshun on leg...Okkar got jelly bean...Go back see 'at nice lady? Get jelly bean?' After telling Mum that I decided that Jasmine needed a hug. I told Mum, 'Mummy, sit next to Oskar and cuddle Jasmine.'

I went for a run with Dad again last weekend. He's been for a few runs without me though. He came back from one a few days ago and he was all wet and hot looking. I said, 'Daddy smell like stinky fart'. He went and had a shower after that.

I've been farting a lot lately. I usually tell whoever is around when I do them. I say, 'Okkar's doing stinky farts smells'. I try to make a good noise as well. Then I want everyone else to do it too. I ask, 'Daddy fart? Mummy fart?' Mum usually tells me to go and sit on the toilet, but I always say no. Yesterday I told Mum, 'Mummy, poo's coming out. Okkar want a nappy'. But she wouldn't give me one so I had to hang on until bedtime when I did get the nappy.

I'm still being a bit too honest. I was making a mess on the table and dropping my knife and fork on the floor after not eating my dinner as usual, when Dad took my plate away. I pointed to the plate and said, 'I want...' then Mum asked, 'Do you want to eat it?' and I said, 'No', then she said, 'Do you want to drop the knife?' and I said, 'yes'. So I didn't get my plate back. Damn.

I've been copying how Mum says Ben! When Daddy does something that he shouldn't do, I yell out, 'BEeEN!' just like Mummy would. A few days ago she said it and put her hands on her hips, so I've been copying that too. If she doesn't say it, then I have to prompt her with, 'Mummy say BEeEN!'

Saturday, October 18, 2003
Damn! I'm too honest - I keep giving myself away. I was in Jasmine's cot after she'd just woken up. I love to make her laugh and I often make silly noises from beside the cot, or climb in with her. But there's really not much room for both of us and I can't help but bump into her occasionally. Jasmine started crying so Mum came rushing in. She asked, 'What did you do, Oskar?' and I replied, 'Okkar's squashing Jasmine's legs.' Oops. I got plucked out of the cot straight away.

I went to see nice Dr. Mark again on Wednesday. Mum wanted me to see him because my eyes were really red and my nose was totally drippy. We got an early appointment and I bounded into the waiting room and yelled, 'Where's Dr. Mark?' His door was open so he actually heard me, which I didn't expect. I got all shy after that. But after a good bit of snooping around his room pressing buttons and generally investigating, I let him look in my throat and up my nose. Seems I get hayfever and I can blame Mum and Dad for that. But I was pleased because that meant that I could still go to 'Shell's house for the day.

But that wasn't all - we then went into Nurse Sue's room where I set about investigating again. There was a big chair with a pedal and when I pressed on the pedal, the chair went up and down. I thought it was fascinating. Mum and Nurse Sue kind of twiddled their thumbs while I did that, so I thought I'd involve Mum and made her sit on the chair. Then I raised her up and down a lot of times. Eventually I sat on Mum's lap and she took off my top. I wondered what she was doing, but then the Nurse came over and pricked my arm with a needle! I said, 'Ow, it hurts!' but then Nurse Sue produced a jar of jelly beans and I forgot all about my arm as I rummaged in the jar to get the red one. Apparently I won't get one strain of the meningococal disease now. I proudly showed Michelle and Bethany my bandaid when we got to their house.

I did some cooking with Mummy on Thursday - we made cheese straws to take to playgroup. I put in the spices and the baking powder and helped make the mixture into blocks to put in the fridge before being baked. I think they were the best cheese straws in a long time.

I went to the gym on Tuesday and Thursday mornings this week. But I wasn't really happy about being there. Both days I spent the whole time sitting at the table watching the other kids. I just felt too shy to go and play. But on Thursday I really needed to pee. Three different ladies tried to help me go - but I refused. I told them I wanted my Mummy to help me, but they didn't get her. I tried to hold on, but I just couldn't, and I kind of burst forth everywhere. Ooh, I was so upset. Why didn't they get Mummy for me? I cried and cried. Eventually one lady decided to check my bag and we discovered that Mum had packed me a spare pair of undies and tracky pants, so she helped me get changed. I still couldn't stop crying though. Luckily Mum came in then and I was so happy to see her - so I cried and cried into her shoulder. I was very happy to go home and go to bed.

Sunday, October 12, 2003
Sorry for the delay between posts. I blame my ghostwriter - she's been a bit distracted this week, so there's a bit to catch up on.

Since school holidays are now over, it's back to my usual routine of swimming on a Monday, Michelle's on Wednesday, Playgroup on Thursday and Mini Maestros on Friday. There's the occasional trip to the gym as well, but I haven't been there much lately.

I was so looking forward to swimming last week, but when we got there all the kids were in the water without their mummies. I'd been moved to a learn-to-swim class, instead of my muck-around-and-have-fun class, because they thought I'd turned three in August. But they got it wrong, and I was too little to join the group I'd been put with. I really wanted to get in though. Mum stood with me by the edge of the pool and we watched for a while. She explained that the kids were swimming by themselves without their mummies, and that she wanted to get in too. I felt a bit sorry for Mummy, having been left out of the class and all, but I still wanted to get in. She eventually dragged me away by promising me special treats at the supermarket.

I had a great time at Harry's house on Tuesday. It was nice weather so we ran around the backyard and chased the chooks. We also threw wet sand at each other and pushed each other off the rocking horse. We ate fruit on the outside table and played with lego on a blanket. And we pushed each other around in a little car and rammed into things. It was all great fun.

I had a great day with Bethany on Wednesday. Gabriel wasn't there, so it was just the two of us. We talked a lot to each other and played some tennis in the back yard. I love it there. When Mummy and Jasmine picked me up, Jasmine was so happy to see me. It was really nice - she smiled at me most of the way home, and if I made a funny face, she laughed. She started looking out the window at one stage so I said, 'Jasmine, laugh at you.' She didn't, and Mummy said that I had to say it another way. I said, 'Jasmine, laugh at me,' but Mum always says, 'she's laughing at you,' so I thought I was saying it right. I thought 'you' was my other name.

Playgroup was okay, but I got hit by one of the other boys and also had a fall. I was playing away at the see-saw when Oliver hit me. I went over to Mummy while trying not to cry and said, 'Ovla hit Oskar.' Mum asked me where he hit me and I rubbed around my back and replied, 'In dere.' We went outside with Jasmine after that to have some quiet time, but I started running and tripped straight forward onto my hands. That hurt and I did cry. So we decided to go home.

As usual when we leave playgroup, I started sneaking off into the bushes instead of walking straight to the car as Mum asks me. Except this time instead of running off just to be naughty, I really needed to pee. Mum yelled at me to go to the car and I yelled, 'Okkar pee!' Mum told me to go in the bushes. I said, 'No, Okkar pee in toilet,' so we went back to the hall toilets and I peed in there. I only pee in the bushes when I'm with Daddy.

This weekend I stayed over at Aunty Dodo's house. Mum and I met her at a cafe at South Melbourne Market where they drank coffee and I drank a babycino. I got pretty bored there so we didn't stay too long before swapping my seat into Dodo's car and heading off to her house. But half way there I really needed to pee. I told Dodo, 'Need Dodo's toilet.' She asked if I could wait till we got home and I said, 'need Dodo's toilet now!' So she stopped the car and I had to go and pee in the bushes.

I now sleep in a big bed on the floor at Dodo's instead of the portacot. I love it. When I woke up on Sunday morning I said to Dodo, 'Okkar had good sleep in big person's bed'. I always sleep really well there. I did some more painting and we went to the beach and watched some kites flying. I also upset Bertram a bit. When I got home I told Mum, 'Okkar made Bertram snarl...Okkar say sorry Bertram'. It's been a good week.

Monday, October 06, 2003
I had such fun with Jasmine this afternoon. She was sitting on Mum's lap and I went up to her and stuck my head on her tummy and wiggled it around. She put her hands on my hair and giggled a bit, then opened her mouth and laughed out loud. I laughed too. I kept swiveling my head around to make her laugh more, and her hands poked me in the face and ear and grabbed my hair. It was really nice - I stayed there for about five minutes. I love to make her laugh.

I played one of my favourite computer games today that I haven't played for a while. The idea is to catch flies and ants by clicking on them, then you drag them to a plant that eats them then burps. But if you click on an ant and let it go before it gets to the plant, then the ant falls down and does, 'Aaaah!' So today I clicked on the ants to make them fall just so I could hear them go, 'Aaaah!' Mummy and I laughed together and imitated the yells - it was fun.

I spent a bit of time doing puzzles in my room today. I don't do them very often - I'd usually rather be dancing or lying on the couch pretending to be Virgil going down the ramp - but enjoyed them today. I did my whole alphabet puzzle, and as I did it Mum and I came up with a word that started with each letter that I picked up. The ones that I thought of were: A for Uncle Ad, D for Dennis and G for Goey.

Daddy took me for a run in the jogger at lunchtime today. Jazzie was screaming so we were both very happy to get out of the house. I love going running with Daddy; we always stop for a play at the park and often meet Mummy, who drives us home, but today it was just the two of us. And Daddy had to run home again. Up the hill. I sat back and enjoyed that.

Saturday, October 04, 2003
Hmm, on second thought, Mum and Dad aren't really that mean. Especially Dad because he's taken me out playing a lot lately and we've had the best time. Last night, Mum and Jasmine and I went to meet him at the tram stop when he was coming home from work, but he arrived too soon and we were still downstairs in the courtyard. I got a bit upset because I really wanted to see the tram - so Daddy took me back to the tramstop and we got on the next tram. I love the trams - I walk around and try out about three seats before deciding which one to sit on. We rode up to Camberwell and got me a fruit bun and then jumped on a tram going in the other direction and got off at the park. I had a run around the park, which was great until I ran smack bang into a pole. I just didn't see it because of the angle of the sun, and collected it with my whole body and the side of my face. I cried after that and Daddy had to carry me home. He was very sweet.

Today we played at my favourite park and then did the shopping together, which was great fun. So he's really not that bad I guess...

I've really been miserable lately. And all of my misery has been completely justified - I don't agree with Mum and Dad at all that I've been a Drama Queen. Especially not a capital D Q Drama Queen.

It was really bright in the loungeroom when I was trying to watch TV, so I said, 'Sun in eyes...ooh hoo hoo...close 'at...a hoo hoo hoo.' (That being the curtains). Then Mum tried to entice me out on to the balcony, but I didn't really want to be there: 'A hoo hoo...sun in eyes...ooh hoo hoo...need hat...a hoo hoo...need sunglasses!' I got my hat and sunglasses, but then she wouldn't let me climb up the wall and stand on the edge of the balcony alone, so I cried some more.

I got a cut on my hand, so I cried about that: 'Okkar need a bandaid...a hoo hoo hoo.' Then I wanted to watch Thunderbirds: 'Okkar watch Funderbirds...waaaaaaa!...Daddy help Oskar...get Funderbirds....waaaaa!'

Yesterday, Daddy wouldn't let me have more than one mouthful of his beer. That was just plain mean, so of course I cried: 'Okkar drink Daddy's beer...waa hoo hoo hoo.'

Last week it was Mum's birthday and Daddy cooked her some panettone. It was very yummy - I loved eating it by pulling out all the fruit, then shredding the bready bits and dropping them all over the carpet. There was plenty left so I've asked for some every day since then: 'Okkar need panettonle...a hoo hoo hoo.' I put in a good sook to really emphasise my point - but they still ignore my request. Well, they don't ignore it, they just say no.

At least Jasmine is nice to me. She smiles at everything I do - not like my mean parents.

Friday, October 03, 2003
'Happy Birfday Amelia.' xoxo

Thursday, October 02, 2003
Well, the Pies lost, but since I was watching the game with Daddy I was barracking for the Lions anyway. Yay Lions!

My cold has been really bad again this week. I've had thick, gloopy stuff coming out of my nose so Mum wouldn't let me go to day care with Bethany and Gabriel. At least I got to spend the day with Nan instead - she didn't mind wiping my nose. I learnt another song at Nan's: 'Hadey, Hadey ho, the great big ephalent is so slow...' But I must have been sick because I slept for three and a half hours when I had my nap! Then I couldn't wait to get back to bed at quarter to seven. But I made up for it by being awake at 5am this morning.

On Tuesday I went out to my very first show! Mum, Nan and I went to see Miffy's Birthday Surprise. It was great fun! First we had to stand in a queue and we stood behind a big girl who was throwing a real hissy fit. I told Mum, 'at girl's crying'. Then we got to go into a really big room with lots of seats and kids everywhere. We settled on seats at the side of the room where we had a good view of the stage, but I could also get up and run around. Which I did. First up I visited the toilets. Then I watched a bit of the show and decided that I wanted another pee. I watched a little bit more of the show then decided that I 'd rather dance. So I ran behind the seats and pranced around dancing, saying, 'Mummy, watch...Mummy, watch...' There were a couple of babies watching me so I kept dancing to keep them entertained. I watched a bit more of the show when Miffy came out, then it was all over and time to leave. Nan bought me an orange balloon with stars on it. I was very happy with the balloon. We got back to the car when I decided that I needed another pee. Mum asked me if I could pee in the bushes, but I was horrified and said, 'No, pee in toilet.' So we went back to the hall and I peed in the toilet. All up it was a great morning.

I've been enjoying playing with Jasmine lately. She watches me wherever I go and I love that! This morning I was playing with my trains and she was lying on the floor watching me. After a few minutes I started breaking up the track, as I usually do, and flinging it everywhere, and Jasmine started laughing really hard. That made me happy so I kept doing silly things so she'd keep laughing. Often when she's sitting on Mum's lap and I walk up to her, she smiles. Then I say to Mum, 'Jasmine's smiling at you,' or 'Jasmine's laughing at you,' and I smile back.

I do like Jasmine. I don't know why I rode my bike into her head this morning. And I don't know why I dropped pieces of train track on top of her head. She cried both times and I felt very bad. But Mum and Dad made me say sorry for hurting her - I didn't think it was THAT bad. I cried and sobbed and held out for a good ten minutes before I finally said sorry. I mean I was sorry, but I didn't want to have to say it - that was Mum and Dad just being mean.

I'm still doing lots of dancing. My clothes are starting to fall off me around the waist - especially when I'm jumping up and down like Michael. I think I need to eat more food - like chocolate and bananas and biscuits and porridge.


Taking in the view with Dad at Sandringham beach

A sort of preview birthday cake...(I turn 5 tomorrow!!!)

We're Dixie and Pumpy

Looooove the Kew Traffic School

We got you, Uncle Ad, now give up!

Are we too cool, or what?!

Watching the ducks on a breezy day...but nothing stops me from wearing my muscle shirt.

I'm not dizzy, no, no...

Whoaah!! Grampa made this for me!

Night-night, Mummy!

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