Illustration by Claire Robertson

My Name is Oskar Tex Hosken and I'm four years old. Daddy built my website for me and Mummy helps me write my journal. I have a little sister, Jasmine, who also has a website.

Read my guestbook

oskar at neuronwave dot com

Thursday, May 29, 2003
I've been watching Cookie Monster and other Sesame Street characters on video. My favourite is Oscar the Grouch; I call him, "Green Oskar." See I can now actually say "Oskar" but I still like calling myself "Okkar." I also really like The Count. Mummy keeps correcting my pronunciation of count though. She wants me to say, "cownt" rather than what I actually say, except she won't let me write it down so you'll have to guess. Speaking of counting, I can count really well now. I sit on the kitchen bench and count the apples and the knives, and I count the stairs as I climb them. One to ten is really easy but I'm not quite clear on the teens yet.

A couple of nights ago during dinner, I was eating corn on the cob and a kernel of corn flicked out of my fingers and landed on Mum. We both laughed and I said, "funny!" Since then, whenever I find something funny, I laugh and say, "funny!" just to make sure people know what I think. And because it's a new word I've learnt so I want to say it a lot.

My cold is improving and I'm feeling much better. The problem with that is that I can't watch TV all the time and have my dummies during the day any more. M & D expect me to play with my toys again. HA! I decided I'd show them that I'll do whatever I want and I emptied the contents of all of my toy boxes on the floor. That is, my entire train set, a Bob the Builder lego set, a jigsaw and assorted other stuff. Oh, and I threw all of my books over the floor too. Then I left them like that and refused to play with them. We'll see how long they stay like that on the floor.

Monday, May 26, 2003
I have a cold. My nose is all drippy and I'm feeling really tired, but I've had the best day. M & D have let me watch TV with my favourite blanket and my dummy. So I've sat on my couch or laid on the floor watching videos and DVD's all day. I started with Guff (Animated Leunig), then went to Pengins (Antarctica), Lions - Rar! (Africa The Serengeti), Da da da ideo (Baby Genius Mozart and Friends), Jemima Puddleduck and Tom Kitten, Thomas (Thomas the Tank Engine), Babanas (Bananas in Pyjamas) and Play School. I had a break from the TV to read some books with Mummy: Clive Eats Alligators, Megs Eggs, Meg at Sea, My Mummy and Babies. Then I went back to the tele to watch Diamonds are Forever. Give me a cold any day I say.

Thursday, May 22, 2003
Daddy and I went to Camberwell this morning to meet Gadad for a coffee and go to the market. I've been wanting to go to the market for a while and asked Mum a few days ago if I could go. I asked: "Go market, Jerry, Henny, Petter Rabbit chockick?" [Jenny gave OT a chocolate bunny for easter] Jenny wasn't there this morning but I said hello to Jerry and eyed Kalamata Man.

Before that we had coffee at Caffe Moravia. I held Gadad's hand as we walked up the road while Daddy pushed the stroller. Gadad had already bought me a scone, which I happily munched on in the cafe. I asked for sugar in my babycino and might have got it from Gadad if Daddy wasn't there. Once I'd finished my coffee I grabbed my scone and headed for the door, leaving Daddy and Gadad at the table. They were just taking too long and I wanted to get on with the shopping.

I've been learning the names of shapes over the last couple of weeks. I ask for, "Teletubbies on Mummy's 'puter," and then, "shape game." I love to play games on the computer. The Teletubbies website is great fun and has heaps of games I like to play. The shape one is where the Teletubbies walk around in a certain shape and I guess what the shape is. I also like the animal parade game where an animal walks on to the screen, I say what it is and point to another one of the same animal. Mum and I then go and draw the shapes on my blackboard. She asks what to draw and I say, "circle, little circle, big circle...triangle..." and we do that until I get bored, about three minutes later.

I'm still working on being a total Goldfinger buff by the time I'm three. When I watch the movie now, I know what is coming up next. I say, "Here comes Pussy. Here comes Pussy Galore." I lie in bed saying, "Uh uh!" and "Tyres rip on ladies car..." I still love playing the golf game with Daddy. I don't think I'll get tired of that. We push around with golf clubs and say, "Uh uh!" when we find the ball and then I stick it down my pants so it rolls down my leg, just like Oddjob. I'm getting better at actually hitting the ball with the golf club. I usually swing the club about eight times before making contact, but yesterday Mum was watching and told me to stand back a bit. I took a step back and hit the ball first go, so I was please with that.

Monday, May 19, 2003
Well I've got Daddy back for being mean a few times. First he asked me to pick him some parsley since I was pottering about on the balcony. I broke off a stem and put it on his sandwich and he was just about to eat it when he noticed the caterpillar. Mummy and I were very amused at that one. Also each time he kisses me, I wipe the kiss off with the back of my hand. Really vigourously too. And today Mummy implied that Daddy was a bit of a dill, so he asked me if I thought he was a moron. I paused and then said, "yes." Then he asked, "Big moron or little moron?" and I conceded that he was only a little moron.

I really upset Mummy today. I've never seen her so angry. I was in the middle of about my tenth tantrum for the day and had been sooking for ages. I'd been sent to my room several times and was really cranky. I was mid wail when Mummy discovered that I was a bit stinky so she took me to the laundry to change my nappy. It just happens that the change bench is adult waist height, which makes most of Mummy's body accessible to my feet. I kicked her while she was taking off my trousers and her eyes flashed but she kept on going, even though Daddy was there and offered to take over. She told me not to kick again but I ignored her and landed a mean kick somewhere above the waist. She roared with fury and yanked me off the table and carted me into my room. Daddy looked as alarmed as I felt when we swept past him. I was so terrified as we went in there but she hugged me and told me not to ever, ever, ever kick her again. She said some other things but I have no idea what because my mind froze. I cried and cried and hugged her back. I think that kick must have hurt and I really didn't want to hurt her now that I think about it. We then went out to the loungeroom and played together and watched a bit of playschool. For some reason I felt much better and was in a good mood for the rest of the evening.

Saturday, May 17, 2003
I'm sooooo miserable. I just want to sit with my blanket and dummies and watch TV. But Mum and Dad won't let me. They're so mean. They won't let me do anything I want. I can't watch TV during the day, I can't help myself to the pantry, I can't throw, I can't hit Jasmine, I can't roll on top of Jasmine, I can't play with Daddy's computer, I can't go back to bed at 10 in the morning, I can't have my dummies during the day, I can't flick the light switches on and off, I can't slam doors. They're so MEAN! So I spend half the day crying and kicking and rolling on the floor screaming. They just don't CARE about my needs. Waaaa.

Friday, May 09, 2003
I've had more play time with Mum this week, which has been great fun. Early in the week she asked me where I wanted to go and I said, "Hays Paddick!" so that's where we went. I ran around solidly for about 45 minutes, dragging Mummy with me. There was even some water back in the lake and some ducks; we were pleased with that. The lake was completely dry a month ago. After the park we went to Baby Bunting to buy me a stool. We got a nice, blue one that's quite high, so I can stand on it to wash my hands and help Mum bathe Jasmine. I love going to Baby Bunting because they have a really big train set with lots of bridges and tunnels and trains. The only problem with that visit was that it wasn't long enough and Mum yanked me out of the playpen before I was ready. I lay down on the floor of the shop and threw a tantrum but she just grabbed me by the arm and dragged me out of the shop. I walked the rest of the way to the car since I didn't really want to be dragged along the asphalt path.

I ran around a lot at playgroup yesterday too and got Mum to come with me a lot of the time. Although there was the moment when she gave me a blood nose, which wasn't much fun. We were chasing each other up the stairs and down the slide. Then I decided to run up the slide and yelled, "Mummy, push..." And push she did, and I fell forwards onto the slide nose first. I must have taken my hand off the slide when she pushed because I usually never hit my face. But it really hurt and I cried a lot, and Mum said sorry lots of times. Then it started bleeding and that really made Mummy feel guilty. She hovered around me with a hanky and kept hugging me and saying sorry. I milked it just a little bit, but not too much because I genuinely felt sore. I said, "Go library, get Ernie Ber, Ernie Ber, Cookie Monster!" I grabbed Jasmine's pram and tried to push it out the door and Mum got the message and we left. Daddy walked to the library with me afterwards but Ernie and Bert and Cookie Monster weren't there so I had to settle for Elmo and Riverdance. I got lots of cuddles from Mummy until bedtime.

Monday, May 05, 2003
So it seems that those little balls on the daisy bush would have actually turned into flowers if I hadn't picked them all off. I didn't know that; it was just fun pulling them off. But Mum was a bit appalled when she saw me plucking them off, so there was the explanation for no flowers being on her daisy bush.

I had a great weekend with Nan and Grandad. First up I went to Toorak Library where I played with Big Lego and had a rock in the rocking boat. A little girl called Samantha came over and I eyed her suspiciously until I realised that she was not after the Lego. So I gave her a teapot to play with. Later on, we dropped in to see G-grandma and G-Grandad and I got to feed the rabbit some carrot. Then we went off to DJ's at chadstone to pick up Nan's coffee beans. I took Gadad up and down the escalators as I love to do there. Then I had a quick play and a run at a park. Once we got back home I watched some Jeremy Fisher, had some dinner, a bath and happily flopped into bed.

On Sunday morning Nan, Gadad and I picked up Uncle Ad and went to Albert Park Lake. I fed the swans and then climbed up the stairs at the point - all 62 of them, I counted. I had a big nap once we got back home and then helped Nan empty the compost bin. There are lots of worms in there. I also mowed the lawn and then went to the park around the corner with Gadad. I was very ready to go home by the time Mummy came to collect me. Especially since she was half an hour later than she said she would be. I was standing behind the front door when she knocked on it. I yelled out, "Mummy!" and she yelled out, "Oskar!", then I said, "James Bond, Tinky Winky?" Just to make it clear what I wanted when we got home. I was so tired I couldn't even stay up until 6.30pm. I love my cot.

Friday, May 02, 2003
Dinner just isn't a happening thing. I don't know why M & D even bother anymore because I haven't eaten much for dinner for months. I'd much rather graze over the afternoon. And I like snack food much more than dinner food. Apples and banana smoothies and dates and biscuits and special treats don't compare with the boring food they try to entice me with. Last night Mum presented me with a plate crammed with all sorts of things. I had a couple of mouthfuls of corn, a few bits of noodles ("worms"), a crusket with a smear of hummous and a bit of tomato. I made a special effort because Dodo was over and I was in a good mood, but I really didn't want any of it. Tonight was baked beans and I had one mouthful.

Anyway, it's easy to get munchy food through the arvo so I'm not hungry. I just need to appeal to Daddy; he's the softy of the family. Mummy tells him off nearly as much as she tells me off. Mum went out this arvo with Jasmine, and I spent the whole time watching Goldfinger, with Dad's permission, even though I'm not meant to be watching daytime TV. It was great. Then I watched Ernie and Bert, and Cookie Monster. But when Dad took me out for a nappy change, I came back and Mum had turned my videos off and had the news on. I cried. She's such a meanie. But I did have a lot of fun with Mum today when we were reading books together, so I guess I'll forgive her.


Taking in the view with Dad at Sandringham beach

A sort of preview birthday cake...(I turn 5 tomorrow!!!)

We're Dixie and Pumpy

Looooove the Kew Traffic School

We got you, Uncle Ad, now give up!

Are we too cool, or what?!

Watching the ducks on a breezy day...but nothing stops me from wearing my muscle shirt.

I'm not dizzy, no, no...

Whoaah!! Grampa made this for me!

Night-night, Mummy!

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